The Struggle...

I've been silent for some weeks now, and what an eventful couple of weeks it has been. In my last post, I cherished the fact that I was an idler no more. I had a job, with descent pay and a descent work to go to every day. I wrote that post on the 9:th and on the 11:th I was fired.

I was fired under the pretext that I was uninterested and passionless about the job. Which I wasn’t, I really wasn’t. The true reasons were of a nature which could not be expressed directly to me, hence the cowardly phone call an hour after work on the 11^th telling me that I’m not welcome back.

I was struck down by the lies certain persons at work told my supervisor at the employment agency, which had provided me with the job. I haven’t been feeling well since, not quite any way.

I have had the means to become an idler again, but I didn’t take it. I took instead a crash course in anxiety management. I was angry for one day, sad for another, panic struck for a third, had extremely low self-esteem during the fourth. On the fifth day I resurrected and applied for a bunch of new jobs. On the sixth day I stood firm and held my own during a job interview. On the morning of the seventh day I stood inside the doors of my new work place. A work place with a history worth fighting for, a work place with nicer people, better pay and a much better contract than I had before.

To all of you who used to see me at my old job (Emma, Micke and Anne): I’m fine and happy… so damn happy to finally be out of school…

I’m happy again…

Has this experience left any mark? During the two weeks that has passed since I got my new job I have struggled with a paranoid feeling of not being able to trust my co-workers. A struggle I’ve seem to have surpassed brilliantly.

I’m strong again…